I blame Nomar.
I blame Nomar for my writer's block. Remember when Nomar was the face of the Sox? When his child-like quirks (shyness, taking the steps two-by-two), just made his athleticism shine that much brighter? When we compared him to Ted Williams - no, when Ted WIlliams compared him to Ted WIlliams. When Jeter and A-Rod said he was the best shortstop there was?
When he left, I thought it was a good move on Theo's part because he'd gotten moody. I thought he just couldn't handle the media attention in Boston. I thought that wherever he landed, he'd make records, top dogpiles, knock lights out like The Natural.
I guess I thought wrong. According to the Susan Slusser of the San Francisco Chronicle, Nomar Garciaparra is widely expected to retire. All that promise reduced to one line: a .313/.361/.521 line over 5,596 at-bats. So long and good night.
Nomar was never my personal favorite player. I was fine (even good) with his leaving. It's his fade that's gotten to me. The slow fade from star to anonymity. Nomar was (and I guess still is) a hard worker. A get-up-and-go guy. An early morning training, no excuses, no offseason kind of guy.
I'm that kind of guy too. I blog (ged) all the time. I wake up and work out (for 20 minutes, but still). I carry my computer everywhere. I'm stressed out. I work like a maniac. And I ended up in the hospital last week with a migraine so bad I couldn't do anything but lie in the dark and cry.
Seeing Nomar fade to black has made me wonder if it's all worth while. What's it all for? Nomar's got a gorgeous wife he loves to be with, and I've got a yummy husband - and the cutest imaginable son, too. It's a good life. With or without baseball. Maybe I'll start to fade too, I thought. Slow down. After all, when I'm gone all I'll be is a line anyway.
But Lou Merloni, Nomar's buddie, says he's not ready to retire. Lou says he's talked to a few teams but he's just waiting for the right situation.
And after some moping (and a warm weather vacation, and lot of newly married bliss), I've decided that I'm not going down like that. I'm not ready to fade. I'm a get up and go kind of girl. Good times and good love and dark chocolate are all good things. But they're not enough. Even if I'm not sure stardom is within reach, I want to play ball.
